Stairway to the little death

"lost stairway" - Raphael Goetter

"lost stairway" by Raphael Goetter

There was a lull.
She peeled her clothes off and her lips grew crooked.
Step one. Transcending.
He was vivid in her mind. Every curve, every crevice.
The hollow of his hip, a path carved in bone.
The scent of his musk.
She closed her eyes. She was climbing.
Flashes of light caught her breath.
Gasping for air. Strands of hair sticky on her sweaty skin.

The sky grew closer. She let out a sigh.

She could see the end, the spot where she would jump.

Her heart raced faster. She held her breath. Her back arched and she let out a cry. Liquid purple and blue and pink trickled down her thighs.

Time stood still.

Then she jumped and dove into the little death.

"la petite mort" - annisa dharma

"la petite mort" by annisa dharma

La petite mortFrench for “the little death”, is a reference for sexual orgasm. More widely, it can refer to the spiritual release that comes with orgasm, or a short period of melancholy or transcendence.

Mentioned briefly in Jean Rhys ‘Wide Sargasso Sea’ as Rochester talks of his sexual relationship with his new wife.

“Then try, try, say die and watch me die.’ ‘Die then! Die! I watched her die many times”

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10 Responses to “Stairway to the little death”

  1. lovelli Says:

    Beautiful short story, Nis. And, of course, breathtaking illustration.

    The idea of orgasmic pleasures as little death is quite bizarre for me. But now that I’m exposed to it, I do think that it’s quite a logical analogy. And a pretty bold one, too.

    The line between pain and pleasure is quite blurry. And some people do find pleasure in the act of inflicting pain itself, some in experiencing pain. And both can be achieved thruogh sexual contacts.


  2. SuicidalCat Says:

    I really really like the illustration..

  3. Ganjarno Says:

    Looks like a pretty nasty new STD to me, or like she’s just melted some lego in her vag. That was very very arresting, thank you.

  4. lovelli Says:

    Yeah, the illustration’s bold.

  5. bilangela Says:

    Very mature Ganjarno.

  6. nyscha Says:

    First of all, thanks.

    Lovelli, it’s interesting that you interpreted it as pleasurable pain. I actually was aiming at freedom, a little death once in a while is very liberating 🙂
    But at the time when I was creating this visual slash verbal piece of work, I was actually feeling very empty and worn out and I think it’s pretty cosmic that you caught the ‘vibes of darkness’ that I thought I hid so cleverly. Kudos to you, you perceptive little thing you.

    Ganjarno, seriously.
    Lego doesn’t manufacture blocks in those colors.
    Please be a little more perceptive next time. You’re welcome, by the way.

  7. Ganjarno Says:

    That’s where you’re wrong:

  8. Bellesbits Says:

    This conversation has made my day.

  9. nyscha Says:

    Ahhh touché, Ganjarno. Please forgive me for doubting your extensive knowledge of Lego’s color palette.

  10. Chocolat Says:

    Perhaps that’s blood coming from the vagina? Masturbating on menstruation?

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